Dedicate/Day 14. Grace.

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01/19/2019 Saturday

On the Mat: 20 minutes.

Observations: My feet ached. My underwear is uncomfortable and my overall mood let’s just say isn’t ideal. It’s been cold up in these parts and after two days of not showing up on the Mat due to my schedule and life shit. I did. I needed it. Man ,I need this practice. My body needs it and God knows my mind does even more. it truly has made such a difference in such a short time. 

Insights: This practice is definitely helping me navigate more Gracefully through the inner reactive roar of negative self-talk that often shows up in my head . 

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But, I’ll Take Today: the Grace that came to the Mat. A mess, relunctant and even a little irritated. But, I came. 

Tomorrow: Day 15. Reveal.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 13. Space.

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On the Mat: 21 minutes.

Observations: This was my favorite thus far! I rocked it. I did awesome and Whoa I have amazing leg strength. No qualms saying it👍. Was it a challenge? Yes. But, I awesomely did it! ⭐️ Gold Star to me. 

Insights: Space. Adriene was gracious with the insight. We must create space for new possibilities and this practice is expanding me to do just that. I honestly am shocked I’ve made this far. But, I’m here in this SPACE of discovery and new possibility. I’m open to the SPACE it is creating by doing and where it leads me. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Prep and Making SPACE for the next two days of challenges. Focusing not on my current limitations, but how I’m investing in this journey. See you tomorrow. 

Tomorrow: Day 14. Grace.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 12. Curate.

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On the Mat: 20 minutes.

Observations: Yesterday I was exhausted and with my work schedule I didn’t show up, but today I did. The flexiablity did also, I could actually touch the ground. Yes, the end move was awkward and my body wasn’t ready. Maybe someday, in the meantime it’s I did what felt good:) 

Insights: Big One! We are the curators of our own lives. It’s our deal and knowone else’s:)

And our Mind sometimes want to quit before our bodies do. Good Good Stuff. Completely Aligning with another project I’m doing right now which I will eventually share with you guys:) 

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But, I’ll Take Today: I reenergized and ready to work on space tonight after a Topo Chico:)   

Tonight: Day 13. Space.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 11. Courage.

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On the Mat: 23 minutes and Yoga for Beginners (YWA) 41 minutes. 

Observations: Balance came and went😂. It’s interesting how one side of the body can be more flexible than the other. Yeah, today their was a posture I didn’t even attempt😜 and totally cool with that. 

Insights: Courage to show up when all over IG I saw this crazy posture everyone was doing and it was way intimidating and I was thinking what the hell did I get myself into🤪 But, this is a big reminder this is my story and I’m not here to show off, but show up. And I love how Adriene encourages that humble heart too. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Another add-on Beginners Practice with Adriene  HERE. Will be doing this another time this week for sure. Now off to work.

Tomorrow: Day 12. Curate.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 10. Expand.

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On the Mat: 25 minutes. + yoga for complete Beginners by Adriene 20 Minutes. 

Observations:  Yea! 10 days on the Mat. I wish I could say something profound happened. Heck that’s what’s profound😜 10 days in the book. Yes, I’m still learning. Yes, I’m still awkward, but also I have moments of grace. I’m loving the calm that’s inhabiting my body and spilling out unto my everyday as well. Today’s practice was all about expanding. I pushed my breath in and out. It felt so lovely. And I found my balance expanding again as with my flexibility. 

Insights: Expand and Oooh Its my One Little Word for the Year too and I was waiting for that word to find me this year and while I was meditating before beginning today’s practice. I thought of how I can expand in my life. Expand beyond old beliefs. Expand beyond expectations and even possibilities. Definitely a word I can grow with in 2019:) and I’m sure this yoga journey can help with that. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: I also decided to dig a little deeper into the basics of yoga and added this 20 minute Yoga for Complete Beginners from Adriene today and plan this week doing few other Beginner Foundation ones this week with the 30 Day Journey. I will post them here as well. It really helped to fine tune my postures and understand deeper the poses. 

Tomorrow: Day 11. Courage.

Ten Day Reflect:  When I started this yoga journey I had no expectations and still actually don’t. I began with a might as well and I’m gonna continue with it:) It’s working thus far more than I ever imagined.  Other Side Effects: Better Sleep. Improved mood and patience with myself and others. More Energy and I glide like a gazelle😜 

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 9. Divine.

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On the Mat: 25 minutes.

Observations: Downward Dog is in the books now. No Modification necessary any longer. Woo hoo. Still awkward in between poses, the flow is coming easier and I’m finding my length returning. Now for balance😜. But, I’ll Take the progress today😊. 

Insights: Breathing in the beauty of  soulful center and the yesterday recurring theme showing up today of honesty. Honesty of learning something new and being open to how awesome it is! Can’t wait to share tomorrow what this journey has meant thus far. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Work and happiness in 9 days on the Mat! 

Tomorrow: Day 10. Expand.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 8. Meditate.

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On the Mat: 28 minutes.

Observations: Day 8 was indeed cozy. Perfect quiet movements in between the fire of the last days. A reminder to be in each day and honest. Honest that I am not as Flexiable nor as graceful as Adriene. Maybe it will come or maybe it never will, but I won’t abandon the try. 

Insights: Slow the eff down. These last 11 days of the new year have actually been amazingly productive and also insightful. But, sometimes when things are going this great. I get greedy with momentum and push for more. Today in this Meditation practice I caught myself to Slow Down again and remember I decided to Rest Easy in making Good:) Do the little things that amount to big stuff in the long run and be present in the in-between like today’s Cozy:) Tomorrow will show up quick enough. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Laundry again:) and Taco’s🌮 tonight. Loving these three days off a week! 

Tomorrow: Day 9. Divine.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 7 Surya.

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On the Mat: 17 minutes.

Observations: After Yesterday’s Core this was a breeze:) ok not completely easy. Still modifying on many parts, but showing up for many of the poses in full. All good:) And I think I might need some yoga pants😜

Insights: my intention today finding my strength in the moment and celebrating it whatever level it is:) Needing this practice right now like the Sunshine outside today. And writing about this morning and then showing up to the Mat to realize Surya means Sun. Love those soulful nudges:) 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Showing up and enjoying the the love of self-care. 

Tomorrow: Day 8. Meditate.

Love, C.

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 6. Core.

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On the Mat: 29 minutes.

Observations: Let me be Honest. I’m trying to find what Feels Good and yesterday after choosing a dear friends call over my morning practice and then planning on coming home at 9pm to do Candle Lit Core:) The reality became... I was tired and just wanted a glass of wine with some little evening Hulu. But, Core happened this morning and that’s ok. This Journey is My Journey and I’m calling the shots:) And I showed up rested and ready. 

So, glad I did! Holy Buckets! That was Throw up working the core city and I’m not kidding. 

Insights: My core is important and I need to do actually do a daily practice of it. Maybe begin with five minutes a day. It does serve me so well and it also is where I carry a lot of my physical baggage (weight). I need to make friends with it and not hold so much shame and insecurity there. Love it and Let it go:) 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Catching up with Friends, Laundry and finding Joy hibernating in the warmth of my little studio. 

Tonight: Day 7. Surya.

Love, C. 

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 5. Flow.

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On the Mat: 29 minutes.

Observations: Tonight was hard. The hardest yet and I have a feeling it ain’t gonna get easier. But, I’m still gonna show up. The flow and movements are becoming familiar which feels good. Yes, I was tired tonight and prefer on a work day doing this practice in the morning instead. I did do a downward dog fully tonight without modification:) that alone was worth it.  

Insights: I’m where I need to be right now and yoga is definitely a gift with bringing daily calm and chill which I experienced today with in a difficult interaction. 👍

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But, I’ll Take Today: Good sleep tonight. 

Tomorrow: Day 6. Core.

Love, C. 

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 4. Feel.

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On the Mat: 22 minutes.

Observations: OK I did Feel tonight (which will be last night when you read this). My muscles shaked and shaked. But, it was worth it. I felt like I wanted to see what a evening yoga would feel like and it was awesome. My strength is there and it feels so natural. I’m kind falling in love with this 30 day or 29😜 Journey. 

Insights: I loved how Adriene explained how this practice at home has so many fruits and permissions to just be with ourselves on this journey. And my heart also has a special connection to her practice more so when she mentioned imagining being on the Hill at Barton Springs in her town of Austin, TX. Which holds 2 years of my own life and still so much of my own heart in the people, places and things still there. So, tonight in honor of showing up to the Mat again. A Topo Chico with a Twist of Lime is in order with a big gulp of gratitude:) 

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But, I’ll Take Today: slowing down. Being present in my daily routine of work and doing my yoga practice tonight. 

Tomorrow: Day 5. Flow. 

Love, C. 

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 3. Observe.

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On the Mat: 35 minutes. 

Observations: Yesterday, Muscles I had forgotten had a good ache and I stood a little straighter too again. I slept like a baby last night as well:)  Today was finding my strength coming back and even a little grace in the movements Truly also getting to observe myself in every little action. Still modifying movements, but allowing myself to think about the possibility of trying tomorrow one full position. Pretty cool:) 

Insights: Magic happens in the In-Between. Love being reminded of that today and that Laughter is lovely. Adriene has such charming soul. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: Day off. Had big plans to do do do. But, I think I’m just gonna Rest Easy with a new book and watch the new Tidying Up series with Marie Kondo on NetFlix😊 

Tomorrow: Day 4. Feel.

Love, C. 

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Buttered to the Edge.

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My Momma always taught me to Butter my Toast to the Edge and since her passing strangely it’s become a little mantra for my life. Attempting to take the basic joys and building a well-fed life off it. 

I’m not talking about eating the whole loaf in the pantry and slathering a stick of butter on one golden toasted slice. But, savoring every Edge just the way I like it. And making no apologies.

Butter is good and toast is fabulous.    Remembering Life is too short to deny ourselves the authentic everyday goodness over a imitation of ideal expectations. Just like I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter. It might look like it or the taste maybe resembles it.  But, ain’t Butter and You might as well go for the Real Thing rather than the imposter. 

Last year was a butter bust for me in that Department. I had a lot of ideas of where I needed and wanted to be. And so many Can’ts (won’ts) So, far in these 6 days of 2019. I have been being, doing and bucking the unrealistic expectations. It tastes good to say the least. Yes, their is some salty moments, but I’m resting Easy in them too. Doing me each day a little bit more. 

Writing daily on the Blog. Showing up for Dedicate- 30 day Yoga Journey via Yoga with Adriene. Taking the Day with Little actions that hopefully will turn into Big Picture Progress. Letting Go of People, Ideas and Things that aren’t serving me in the moment. And showing myself Kindness again. 

And thanks for coming along with me.  

Love, C.  

Dedicate/Day 2. Foundation.

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On the Mat: 40 minutes.

Observations: I woke up with a good ache from yesterday. Day 2 is much better with clean wood floors and Polish free toes. Less distraction to focus on being more present in the practice. Love how Adriene gives us permission to modify and come as we are whatever level we are at. I know I’m a beginner for sure. Awkward at times with my poses, but still bringing the best I can. 

Insights: Foundation. Breathing and remembering to connect with my body. Not fighting it’s current beginner status. And being present in the movements, showing a little love and not just going through the motions.  

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But, I’ll Take Today: It’s a work day and I need to drink my water. And Let Go. I also found out what nameste means:) to Bow and honor ourselves and each other. 

Tomorrow: Day 3. Observe. 

Love, C.  

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 1. Discern.

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On the Mat: 50 minutes.  

Observations: I showed up. My back ached, but I still felt strong. Yes, I will find my groove. Adriene is funny, kind and perfectly quirky. I planked and my arms shaked. I really need to sweep my floor and do a little pedicure if I’m gonna be on the mat more. I breathed deep and it reminded me of how far I have come. Self-care is important. I didn’t have to use my pink pillow. 

Insights: Strength over time. Discerning my why’s. And that I really am doing this to Rest Easy and Sink deeper into who I am and Not fight to be something other then Cindy Today. Imperfect, but showing kindness to myself by showing up. 

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But, I’ll Take Today: A Pedicure. A Clean floor and finding out what Namaste means:) 

Tomorrow: Day 2. Foundation.  

Love, C.  

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:)

Dedicate/Day 0. Orientation.

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Hi I’m Cynthia or Cindy if you’ve known me for along time. I’m a curious soul and like trying new things. So, I’ve decided to go on this 30 day Yoga Journey with many other cool souls out there:) And being a storyteller, I’m gonna try to tell the story as well as I can. Keeping it simple.

Here goes:

On the Mat: 0 Minutes.  [Time spent on the Yoga Mat during this 30 day Journey and of course I’m giving myself more or less time permission] 

Observations: Orientation. No Yoga. Pep Talk. So, Glad I came across this opportunity to remember how to show up for myself again. Adriene seems so kind and it’s awesome that she is doing this for Free. And I love that she’s based out of my Beloved ATX. [Observations each day will be a mini version  to my daily practices of Flow Pages- uncensored whatever comes to mind.]

Insights: I’m just gonna show up. No giant expectations. Just Resting Easy in my 2019 intentions of sinking into Who I Am and not trying to chase ideals that don’t serve me.  [Insights are my little a-ha moments or tiny epiphanies/sparks that show up to remind me of the bigger picture] 

Calendar. A free download from Dedicate. I’ve decided to post it each day and cross off my progress with A Design Kit. 

Calendar. A free download from Dedicate. I’ve decided to post it each day and cross off my progress with A Design Kit

But, I’ll Take Today: Get my Mat out. And discover my Why’s- Find my strength again. Take Deep Breaths and learn something new.  [Todays little actions and acceptance of Now.]

Tomorrow: Day 1. Discern.  [Whats up for the next day] 

I hope this break down helps and you might choose to come along with me. 

Love, C.  

PS It’s not too late for you to Join myself and many others on Dedicate-A 30 Day Yoga Journey. HERE  It least check it out:) 

Girl, Wash Your Face.

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Just like my Momma always taught me, “You never go to bed with a dirty face. Cleanse, Moisturize and maybe even do a mask.” I literally can count on two hands of adulthood how many times I went to bed with a unwashed face and it usually involved too much alcohol:) The other 100,000 of nights even if still alcohol or sickness was involved. I get that face washed and I swear by it. No lie here. 

So, when I saw Rachel’s Hollis Book of the same title keep popping up on my IG feed and finally seeing it on the shelf of my local Target. It went home with me. And then it sat. And sat some more on my writing table. It eventually was moved to my bedside to sit again. I will be honest here, I had resistance to opening its pages.  

Some guilt for buying it when I’m broke as no joke. Some Trepidation that it would be another feel good book that motivated me to take on my world of self-doubt and find myself worse off than before.   But, a bad day came. The kind of day where you say fuck it, what do I have to lose. And my resistance cowered in the corner as I opened the pages. 

I didn’t put it down unless I had to pee, go to work or eat. I had a pen with me as I read. Underlining. Putting notes in the margins. I also laughed, cried, and even read chapters that I thought I couldn’t relate too.  

By the time I finished the last paragraph. I knew why Rachel Hollis is New York Times Best Seller, a motivational speaker and CCO with well over 900k followers on Instagram. She’s Real. I mean Vulnerable, Strong Real. She lived the Messy parts, the disappointments and works Real Hard without compromising Humanness of Who She is to fit into a Mold others might of expect.  

So, Read her book. I know if I could I would buy you all a copy and a shiny pen to go along with it. I would, I really would.

And as the the Book Cover Tagline says, “Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are. So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be.” 

It’s seriously not too late. 

Love, c.  

Home.

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In this month of Thanksgiving, home is numero uno on my gratitude list. Over the years I’ve had many of them, especially while growing up. But, my Mother always taught me the true recipe for what made a plain house really a Home of homes. A big dose of Character, a few Objects of Affection and the secret sauce of moments/memories. I hope this little essay helps you too find a little gratitude in your own current home. 

Character.  

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My current home oozes with it. A old Hotel built in 1920 now turned into Apartments. It still holds it’s by-gone charm. Old Telephone booth, great Gatsby chandeliers and a grand piano in the lobby. Some of it to my own chagrin, like the original wool, smelly hallway carpet with it’s lumpy horsehair (yes, horsehair) sub floor padding that is better suited for the 70’s horror classic the Shining🤭 in my 2nd Floor Hallway. But, it’s the price you pay for old and unique I guess. 

But, my little studio apartment itself I couldn’t be more in love with though. It’s corner location with the best warmer month cross breeze you could ask for and the all year around perfect natural light for any photo shoot I choose:) 

Then there’s the high ceilings, grey walls trimmed with white wainscoting. Even a pink tiled bathroom just like my beloved Grandmothers and a breakfast nook that I swear was made just for my Grandfathers handmade table from the same era.  

Oh it’s just perfect for me to wake up to every morning in my cozy bed surrounded by light. Then   soon after beckoning me to my writing table for coffee and city sights outside my window.  I truly couldn’t ask for more character now to call home.  

Objects of Affection. 

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I’m surrounded by them. A mix of Mid-century with family heirlooms and of course the books. Neatly piled on the floor by my front windows, but still begging for custom shelves. Someday. 

Over the years though I’ve come to be more of a minimalist. I currently have nothing hanging on my walls and I kind of like it that way in small spaces. But, I’ve also learned having the things we love around us really helps to make a home special. I try also to get rid of the things that mean little me now or have served their purpose but know-longer fit into my current life or style. Even things that meant something to others. I know it sounds harsh, but if it’s not something you love get rid of it. A huge reminder that things aren’t people. Take a photo and let it go.      

 Memories/Moments.

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The stories walls hold and these walls hold a lot. My stories and the ones that go back to it’s first tenant. I often love imagining what they might be while I sip my own coffee in the morning while I live out my own story here.  

Mine has been of solitude and comfort after healing from my surprise open heart surgery. Learning to navigate a new life in a city where my Father was born. Loving the unique charecters and neighborhood I live in that has opened my eyes in a way I never imagined. Finding my lifelong Faith being challenged to a place of awesome openness to infinite possibility. Meeting true independence for the first time and finding loneliness not as a enemy, but as a cool friend that has taught me how kick-ass I really am.  Having my creativity reawaken in big magic sort of way and not limiting it to old dreams. Entertaining Friends and Neighbors with my famous Mexican Martinis and not so famous homestyle tacos. Long distance conversations with my dear Dad usually on Friday nights. Just to name a few for now until new ones arise.

A reminder our overall story is on-going and new characters and memories should always be welcome in any house we call home. But, in the meantime it’s nice to be here. 

Love, C.  

October.

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Last night on my way home from work waiting for the bus. A man striked up a conversation with me about the brilliance of the full moon. These kind of conversations with strangers often find me, especially living in the city. But, I’m ok with it. In some ways I’ve learned to welcome these short moments with people I will never see again. Often like the changing of seasons and this current one. They come and go so quick. It’s definitely not unlike the newest cycle of the moon:) 

Reminding me this morning as I awoke while too realizing I also needed creamer for my coffee:) I immediately threw on my writing sweater (yep I have such a thing) to head down to my neighborhood corner store. It’s not atypical gas station stop, it’s literally a old store in the basement of the apartment building next to me. And It’s definitely from another era, not mine but my Grandparents. And I love that I get to time travel every time the store door jingles open for me. 

Today was no different, My Buddy Robert was working, who intriguely is a former professional dancer now turned Farmers Market Founder (which is now closed for the season) who also has lived the most fascinating life and his beautiful blue eyes tell it ten folds. And there also by the register were also a few other of my favorite neighborhood characters including my Landlord buying organic coffee and being super disappointed that the store was out of his favorite donuts:) and they only had the awful crusty coconut flake ones left. Which actually are my favorites:)  Hee! 

I then ended up having coffee with them all except the landlord. He needed to get back to Lording:)  So, me not caring with no bra on and still having epic bed head. Embracing that my corner store loves me at even my most dishelved.

We then all ended up talking about a mydrid of subjects: The history of my 1920’s building, the article pitch I’m currently working on for the Huffington Post, the oldest Catholic Church in New Mexico and how I actually do jump from subject to subject when I’m excited which also recently a friend brought to my attention for the first time;) By the way Robert does it as well and Thank God I’m not alone in this awful affliction:) 

But, we did actually end our random coffee talk rant eventually with how I began this post. The moon and how tonight will be a Real Full Moon instead of last night. See every story is usually woven together. Where the tides will be pulled as with this very present season. Some unpredictablity and perhaps a little lunacy of getting out of our usual cycle and trying something new might occur. I doubt it, but it’s nice to imagine sometimes. 

Thanks for swinging by for this little post and I wish you a wonderful rest of October and unique full moon wherever you are. I promise I will start blogging again too and for the love of God editing before pushing post😮. ♥️🌛

C.