Happy New Years my Friends! and I might know what is on your mind this evening or morning... those Resolutions/Goals for 2018 (love or hate em:). I know they're on my mind as well and I hope you're excited as I am about the prospect of digging in and making it happen. But, then that little voice of doubt sneaks in (I know it so well) and reminds us of our epic fails or half-ass attempts of resolutions in the past. Maybe we started out strong in the first weeks of the new year and then found ourselves a couple months later back to old ways. Then fully immersed in those big ol' feels of failure.
But, let me be honest here... We’re not alone. More than half of all New Years Resolutions fail. But, ours doesn't have to be one of the casualties. Over the years, I personally have been very successful in keeping resolutions going and eventually seeing some pretty profound results, like losing 100 pounds and writing a 430 page rough draft of a Novel! I know those were some big ass goals I accomplished and sometimes still I can't believe I did it. But, I did and they started out with ONE surprising step and then soon followed by a few other Key elements. And I am ready to bust open my Resolution Secrets with you and hope maybe they can help you kick some goal setting/doing ass too:) *I know I need a reminder myself.
Thoughts Create Action.
Anytime I have been successful with a Goal. I thought about it first. I know what your thinking... duh I do that all day too, but nothing ever happens. But, this is where intentional thought comes in. Where it is not our everyday, fleeting, oh wouldn't that be nice thoughts. But, real thought. Visualizing thought. Where you 'Try it On for Size' in your mind.
Here is a little exercise. This last year I came across this exercise and it has helped me immensely to understand how our thoughts do create action. Look around the room or where you are right now. Notice all the things that surround you. Pick one and focus on it. I'll use the table I am sitting at right now that my Grandfather made. I am sure what inspired to make this table was a sensible one. My Family needs a new Kitchen Table. I can save money and build one myself. Then he thought about the needs and design of the family. He made a mental note of supplies needed, probably thought about how he could craft a table and set of chairs with some simple design details as well. Then he went to the Lumber yard and hardware store. Gathered his tools and begin his project. See what I am getting at... Everything begins with a Thought. Even the Computer, tablet or phone you are reading this on. It's kind of mind blowing isn't it? But, when you break it down Thoughts create a plan, then a Action and then a Goal arises.
What Thought (goal) keeps arising in your own Life?
Pick one Goal and really choose it.
When my Doctor diagnosed me 8 years ago with Type 2 Diabetes and told me I had no choice but to Lose Weight. He then gave me two options: either lose the weight on my own or in his professional recommendation, Lap band Surgery. A couple days later still in a daze, I attended the Lap Band informational meeting. It was more like a infomercial for surgery (more on that at a later date:) But, I sat through the sale and left freaked out by all the possible complications and modification of my stomach. Right then and there in the Hospital's parking lot. I made my choice/goal. To Wholeheartedly Lose Weight on my Own.
So, what is your ONE goal? The one that really sparks your HEART? How can you really CHOOSE it?
plan. plan. plan.
After I made my decision to lose weight. I found things really aligning. Their is really a blessing in deciding. God has a way of helping us, if we begin to help ourselves. I planned out every detail and did my share of healthy weight loss research after spending nearly a lifetime on fad diets. I even wrote out a timeline of where I would like to be in a year. Of course there were hiccups that came along once I began. But, I always kept my plan nearby and adjusted it to fit the challenges that came my way.
What is your planning rituals? Do you write it down? If you don't, you should. It makes a world of difference.
Doable and bite-sized.
I am not gonna blow smoke up your tush. Losing 100 pounds was Hard. The pounds were easy actually once I found what worked for me. But, it was the mind thing and years of emotional habit that gave me and still does a hard time. But, breaking my goal into something that was doable and bite-sized (small goals within the Big Goal). I did it.
Doable. What I mean by that is I made it realistic. I wasn't going to become the perfect picture of health overnight. I had to stop the madness of unrealistic expectations and time frames. I lost that 100 pounds over 2 1/2 year span. And from day one understand that my Goal had to be unique to me and not in comparisons to others. Like the ideal weight. I honestly never will be considered skinny, but I don't care. I want to find my own doable healthy:) How doable is your Goal? Is it Realistic? If not how can you adjust it to be?
Bite-Sized. Or fun size:) You know those little candy size treats we get for Halloween. It's like that with Goals. I remember when I was over 350 pounds. Walking around the block was a bear or God forbid a hill came my way. But, my bite-sized goal was making that hill or block with ease and adding more mileage eventually. I remember the day when it happened and to be honest that little goal still is one of my biggest accomplishments. And since then every little goal met has become a celebration. What Bite-Sized Goal can you start with?
I know I have spent most of this post using my weight loss as example, but there is something very special that I accomplished that taught me the importance of being Present with my Goals. My 430 page Novel Draft (actually I have written 2:)
I had a story brewing in my head for years and when my Mother was first hospitalized for her Leukemia. I sat for days with nothing to do while she recovered. So, I wrote. It began with one page and in a week... I was finished. My Hand ached, but heart was present during that time. Only taking time to make her feel comfortable and loved. Writing that draft allowed me to surprisingly stay present. Feeling the surge of life in my words. Now I read it and I see how it helped me initially cope with my Mother's illness. It helped me stay present. I know that sounds odd. Writing a novel while your most loved person is sick. But, when I put that pen down to be with her when she was awake. I was fully there. My mind was not filled with what if's. When we are Present with our Goals, We are truly living. We're making things happen Now instead of waiting for the right time.
How can you be Present with your Goals Now? How can you be Mindful of this Moment?
Now it is your time.
I would love for you to share your resolution/goal. I will share mine too:) below in the comments. Let's Share it together:)