Ephphatha Perspective.
I’ve been fumbling on this post all week. Cutting, Pasting and Re-Writing. I create blog posts not only to share, but process and this past Month I’ve had a pretty Heavy Decision on my Heart. Kind of Literally. Here goes…
Do I have Weight Loss Surgery recommended by My Cardiologist or Try to do it alone again?
If you are New to StoryboardC let me give you a quick backstory of why I need make this decision. When I was 15, I had a rare case of undiagnosed rheumatic fever that damaged my Hearts Mitral Valve. So, fast forward to four years ago at 42, I had Open Heart Surgery to replace it with a Porcine🐷Valve.
The many years in between the fever and surgery I was often sick without knowing the cause. So, I did everything in my power to feel better including Losing over 100 pounds.
Sheesh I did a decent job with that abridged version. But, I did leave out all of the years of self-blame and felling like I didn’t do enough that went along with all the Misdiagnosis by health professionals.
It truly was a miracle when I Finally was diagnosed (my heart was giving up) and to also hear the words “it wasn’t your Fault” from my Doctor.
But, a month ago when I had my Annual Echocardiogram and the results came back not so great. That old feeling came back again.
Now with the new stress on my Mitral Valve and my overall Heart from my recent weight gain this past year and half. I have to make that decision. Either Lose Weight ASAP or have Open Heart again in a year.
So, after lots of prayer, discernment and research. I am Open to Weight Loss Surgery.
I don’t have two years to slowly lose weight as I did in the past. It pains me to ask for help when I know I am fully capable of Weight Loss alone. But, this is bigger than me now. I want to live a healthy life and if this will afford me more time before Open Heart Surgery (6-8 years) I will do it.
I have to go into this with a whole new Perspective.
Ephphatha!
Meaning: Be Opened in Aramaic. And after listening to THIS HOMILY and reading the Gospel of Mark:
The Healing of a Deaf Man.31j Again he left the district of Tyre and went by way of Sidon to the Sea of Galilee, into the district of the Decapolis.32And people brought to him a deaf man who had a speech impediment and begged him to lay his hand on him.33He took him off by himself away from the crowd. He put his finger into the man’s ears and, spitting, touched his tongue;34then he looked up to heaven and groaned, and said to him, “Ephphatha!” (that is, “Be opened!”)35And [immediately] the man’s ears were opened, his speech impediment was removed, and he spoke plainly.36* He ordered them not to tell anyone. But the more he ordered them not to, the more they proclaimed it.37They were exceedingly astonished and they said, “He has done all things well. He makes the deaf hear and [the] mute speak.”k
Ephphatha! has become a rally cry of sorts for healing and perspective. Going forward with a new voice and hearing. Not just listening to my old fears and pride. To be humbled to see myself in all my challenges and not clinging to my past accomplishments for a measure stick of what success looks like. Reminding myself God has a plan for my health that is far better then mine.
This won’t be easy. I’ve done my research for my first appointment tomorrow and have lots of questions! But, I look at my Picture above and know that work has to be done. I know there will be lots of noise around me about making this choice. But, I have to stay in Perspective of what God sees and trusting HIM completely.
He knows my 🫀 better than anyone.
I will keep You posted on how the appt.’s go and the next steps on this journey. Thank you ♥️.
Love, Cynthia